AgZed (2298) 78 SFW Posts | 470 Space Comments | Favorites | RSS Feed Registered 2008-02-14 01:27:48 Comment Karma: 142 Featured Comments: 0 Member of :

Recent Comments from AgZed

Comment on cloe moretz - pocket dress (2011-10-21 21:22:25)
I know nothing about fashion, but even I could tell something was wrong with that dress. Because it has pockets. Women don't like pockets. At least, that's the hypothesis I've derived from watching countless women assemble entire outfits without a single pocket, or, when wearing clothes that do have pockets, refuse to put anything in the pocket, thus denying the pocket the purpose of its existence. I've learned to accept this fact as just one of the differences between men and women, but I'll never understand it, because pockets are fucking awesome.
Comment on how dare you disobey your masters (2011-10-05 21:10:11)
From what I remember of the story, I think he drew this himself. First thing he drew once he'd recovered enough to hold a pencil or somesuch.
Comment on Penis size chart (2011-09-29 00:09:38)
I first saw this picture about 3 years ago, and since I had a measuring tape just sitting on my desk, I got down to some measuring. As it turned out, the length & girth reported by women to be "perfect" worked out as roughly the length & girth of my forearm. Three years later, every suggestion I've made to a woman that they might enjoy fucking something the size of my forearm has been met with horror and fear. This leads me to one of two conclusions: 1) Women are lying 2) Bitches can't measure
Comment on blinking spongebob (2011-08-29 22:24:03)
*reads most of the text* "wtf?" *reads the last line, sees .gif extension* "Ah, I see how this works" *Spongebob blinks* "Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!"
Comment on A rather depressing comic. (2011-08-01 01:19:18)
"Rather"?
Comment on rapture and samurai (2011-07-23 01:38:49)
It's actually the level 60 epic PvP set. At least, that's what my, um, nerdy nephew tells me. I'm far too busy having sex with attractive women to have any time for such silliness.
Comment on Women's World Cup Reactions (2011-07-22 03:39:17)
You may have beaten us in a recent sporting event, but don't forget we beat you in a war that has almost passed out of living memory, so there!
Comment on me VS you VS whoever (2011-07-15 02:20:08)
Most of the Linux-on-Mac hating I see amounts to "Why did you pay $2000 for a tarted up version of Unix?" Which is kinda a fair point.
Comment on smirnoff mixers (2011-07-13 22:45:52)
I don't understand mixers. Not just vile shit like Smirnoff Ice, but the shit that otherwise rational people insist on diluting their spirits with. And chilled? You can't taste it when it's chilled! I was visiting a friend a while back, who remembered my fondness for Johnnie Walker Black Label. I was horrified when he retrieved it from the freezer - the fucking freezer - and when he poured it into a glass and asked me what kind of pop I wanted in it, I nearly fucking died. So listen up, Internets, I'm going to tell you how it's fucking done. Store your good shit at room temperature. If you're serious about your shit, invest in a liquor cabinet. They look nice, and tell everyone who sees them that you know what the fuck you're doing. Invest in some nice glasses. I'm fond of snifters because no matter how drunk you get, it's impossible not to look goddamn class when you're holding a fucking snifter. Now take the bottle from your liquor cabinet, and pour yourself a glass. Let the heat from your hand gently warm the sweet amber; getting fucked up classy-style is not an enterprise to be rushed. Take a sip. Not a dainty little sip mind you, take a fucking manly sip. Let it sit on your tongue. Swirl it around your mouth. Once the initial "burn" wears off, you might be surprised to find that this shit has flavor, and it's fucking good. Exhale gently through your nose, allowing the vapors to enhance the flavor. Inhale, and relish the tingling in your sinuses. Then swallow, and delight in the warm little fireball detonating in your stomach. The next part is vital. I see so many people get so close, and then blow it at the end by exhaling loudly through their mouth and saying something clever like "Fuck!" If you do this, you're a fucking disgrace. Keep your mouth shut, and exhale slowly through your nose. If it makes your eyes water, you're doing it right. Then repeat the process until the appropriate level of shitfacedness has been achieved. You'll know you've reached it when you realize you're the only one in the room with a modicum of class. Resist the urge to point it out though, that would be rather common. Congratulations, you now know how to get wasted like a man.
Comment on Europe vs USA: The End Game. (2011-07-09 07:52:58)
Did they really have to go all the way back to the 1600s to get another great European scientist? Stephen Hawking is British, ffs.
Comment on kasumi goto (2011-07-08 04:41:19)
Content you didn't download, more like. She was voiced by the blue chick from Farscape, er, that is, the blue chick who had hair from Farscape, which was kinda cool. Fairly meh loyalty mission, but her ability to randomly one-shot just about anything was kinda handy. I'd probably be more critical if I'd paid for the DLC, but I paid $60 for the goddamn game, so everything else that comes out for it is fair game in my books.
Comment on rating women (2011-07-07 19:41:21)
I was talking about the chart. There's no Asians rated lower than a 9 on the chart. I've been to Tokyo, Singapore and Beijing, and live in Vancouver, so I've seen plenty of fugly Asians.
Comment on rating women (2011-07-07 05:45:16)
The highest rated black woman on the chart is actually a 4. See there at the end? At the back, if you will? Though despite my preference for vanilla, there is far too little non-white representation on this chart. And it might just be me, but I don't think there's any Asians rated lower than a 9...
Comment on jesus should have been aborted (2011-07-06 10:02:32)
From what I recall, Yahweh heartily endorses ripping unborn babies from their mothers wombs and dashing them on rocks on more than a few occasions, so it seems as though he isn't so much opposed to abortions as he is to the mothers surviving the procedure. Isn't it wonderful that we live in a universe created by such a loving and merciful god?
Comment on proving atheists wrong with science 1 (2011-07-06 09:23:37)
Indeed. If drinking water reduces the amount of total water on the planet, and there wasn't enough to cover all the land pre-Flood, then where did the water to submerge the entire surface of the planet come from? And where did it go? Did a boat full of people & animals somehow drink several trillion liters of water in under a year? And if water can just be magically created to cause the Flood, why can't it be magically created to keep the oceans full? In their attempts to prove atheists wrong, it seems they've accidentally proven the Bible wrong. What now fundies? You're slowly proving yourselves wrong. What will you do when you have neither scripture nor fake science to back you up? Where can you turn?