suicydking (2291) 49 SFW Posts | 1,185 Space Comments | Favorites | RSS Feed Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it. Registered 2008-02-13 17:34:16 Comment Karma: 64 Featured Comments: 0 Member of :

Recent Comments from suicydking

Comment on Grand Coulee Dam (2009-10-13 12:46:29)
Where's the damn dam tour?
Comment on C64 (2009-10-12 18:25:17)
L shift-O and then " to the $
Comment on the first game wih a easter egg (2009-10-12 17:29:22)
For anyone who has ever played this game and got pissed off about constantly being eaten by a dragon: Go to http://www.homestarrunner.com/main13.html There are about 25 different flash skins for the page, the above link is for skin number 13. It's an atari themed skin. When you mouse over the navigation buttons on the left of the page, several different atari moments happen. If you mouse over the Email link, you get the one from Adventure, starring Strongbad & the goddamned dragon.
Comment on Half-Life 2 case mod Xbox 360 (2009-10-12 10:33:37)
DO WANT!!!
Comment on Ghillie Suit (2009-10-09 08:01:12)
One more thing we can thank the Scottish for. I think that brings the list to ghillie suits and whiskey.
Comment on Candy Cross (2009-10-07 08:25:58)
Easter is no affront. It's a vivid reminder of the Church's ability to assimilate traditions and cultures in it's attempt to blot out all other religions. The rabbit, the eggs, the bright colors... all part of pagan fertility celebrations of the springtime. Using these icons for Easter is like holding the severed head of your enemy high over the battlefield.
Comment on A capybara in a bathtub (2009-10-05 09:25:47)
I've always wanted a pet capybara. I wonder if they are as friendly or social as domesticated rats.
Comment on Microsoft sidewinder gaming mouse (2009-10-05 08:42:56)
Fatality sucks. Trust me. The buttons wear out after a month, and the driver support is terrible.
Comment on left for dead poster collection (2009-09-30 09:58:20)
I take issue with the sequel a year format with this franchise in particular. This is a game from Valve, damn it. Half Life2 was in development for 6 years. TF2 and CSS are still being modded & updated. L4D is a CSS mod and was supposed to be getting frequent updates. Instead, we got one new campaign for 10 bucks (if you got it for the XBOX) and the addition of 2 versus maps that should have been shipped with the game on release. I expect more from Valve. They're one of the few software companies who doesn't usually churn out crap-for-profit formula software and I have been supporting them by actually purchasing their games.
Comment on if the towel dispenser is empty - please use your cloths (2009-09-29 12:35:18)
When my son was five years old, I asked him once why he was wiping his hands on his pants when he was eating. He said it was because he wasn't wearing a shirt.
Comment on crotchshot (2009-09-26 13:42:32)
Very nice, but I think you may have posted the wrong picture...
Comment on Bird Clinton (2009-09-25 18:22:03)
Actually nate, since I live in New York State... MY Senator is a bird. Your argument is invalid. Well, my former Senator is a bird.
Comment on cure for obama communism is a new era of mccarthyism (2009-09-24 14:03:17)
@ GAThrawn: "For example. Do I think homosexuality is wrong. Yes. I have a moral opinion on that. But I do not have the right to punish you for your actions. The Government as no right to be involved in it at all; it is a personal issue." So you agree that same sex marriage should be legal in all 50 states? Beacuse THAT would be the government not getting involved. Understanding that by marriage I mean civil union, granting all rights as a spouse including hospital visitation, tax and adoption rights. Not bashing, just genuinely curious what you meant.
Comment on Shaft Off Camera (2009-09-23 14:43:52)
Bullshit. He's clearly leaning ON the camera. And he's looking left, right?
Comment on Screw You Comcast (2009-09-23 11:15:26)
Follow my lead here folks. Ditch your cable provider. Get netflix. Instant streaming through your PC or XBOX. Watch everything else on Hulu or on the website of the show/network itself. Bonus: Because you have to choose what to watch in advance, you don't just sit down, turn on the TV & tune out while some show you can barely tolerate takes up an hour of your day. Other bonus: a savings of 50-150$ a month that you can spend on things like leaving the house.