With nothing more than his bare hands and keen intellect, Chuck Norris has killed, maimed, and brutalized hundreds of Hollywood careers. After his fight scene with Chuck Norris, martial arts legend Bruce Lee died. Jonathan Brandis, who starred in Norris’ Sidekicks, was reduced to acting opposite a talking dolphin and became an hero when he was cut from Hart’s War.
Chuck Norris Facts is a prototypical funny old meme that most people grudgingly like. The joke is a rip-off of similar jokes about Wise Beard Man. Since Norris’ old movies are based on the premise that he has a superhuman ability to kick dirty foreigner ass, the Facts exaggerate these lofty abilities to epically unlulzy proportions. At least 100 years ago, there was a time everybody enjoyed Chuck Norris jokes.
And if Chuck Norris Facts have never made you laugh, not even once, you simply need to smoke more weed.
This was Chuck Norris Facts 101 with dieA. Every Saturday at 9am. Tune in next time!
atleast *eye roll* our pussies care!. rather than your cocaine in a bottle druglaw.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/04/12/cocaine_case.jpg
company who play monopoly with the world trying to control ever damn beverage and spreading corruption in everything they associate with.
Besides, we got post-modern hippies with all the cannabis & psychedelic mushrooms we want. so booya!
dieAntagonista (#)
15 years ago
Pah! I AM a post-modern hippie. But yea, a clever one, taking over the world is the most basic thing on our list.
Haha, your cannabis ain’t got no shit on our caffeine.
And where else do you see scientists and reptiles mingle
It’s when they sniff white powder, to feel the tingle
Round and round goes the jingle
Notice the error in intellectual terrorists
Stealing minds and they ain’t need no fists
When mountains explode and even Goliath resists
Your chemicals are weak and so are your priorities
Now follow us or go down on your knees
@...dieAntagonista: wow and i thought vanilla ice – ice ice baby was the worst. i think you need to recheck your status if you claim that your a post-modern hippie lol
Are you dissing my rhymes. Do you know what they call people who diss someone’s rhymes without throwing some rhymes back? You obviously didn’t get any of it. Or you would understand how a post-modern hippie could take over the world.
Yo, your credibility has just hit the bottom of the barrel. Can you hear the echo? Echo echo.
I always thought the whole Chuck Norris meme was kinda silly, but I have to admit that made lol.
I don’t really think Tabasco is suppose to be “hot,” as much as it’s just suppose to add a little flavor. But, I don’t really like the flavor compared to Frank’s.
If anyone wants my opinion, I believe that Steven Segal would win in a fight to the death.
dieAntagonista (#)
15 years ago
Personally, I think Terence Hill would just shoot the motherfucker. And he’s the fastest also, not even ninjas would have a chance.
And then there’s also McGyver. Obviously he wouldn’t have any chance against Bruce motherfucking Lee, or Steven Segal even, but he’s got the brains! My father always said that the brain is the only muscle you need to be unbeatable. I just realised my father knows a lot of cheesy one liners. But it sounds so darn convincing.
SumoSnipe (#4452)
15 years ago
@...dieAntagonista: Thats cause mcGyver would build a bomb out of that bottle of sauce,an odereater,3 toothpicks, and chewing gum. sit back and BOOM. even The Bruce would have a hard time with that.
pshh thats not even strong.
Where do you buy it?
Chuck Norris cried when I refused to let him suck me off.
@...kostoglotov: fail. vice versa = win
@ColombianMonkey: Chuck Norris is an ignorant hick. He is also a huge f*ggot, and has a miniscule penis.
@ColombianMonkey: Chuck Norris is an ignorant hick. He is also a huge fggot, and has a miniscule penis.
@...kostoglotov: only you would know lol. as i say vice versa = win
This tabasco stuff is not strong.
It’s weak.
This tabasco’s kung fu is not strong.
Its kung fu is weak.
Eh, I’ve had much stronger hot sauce. A drop of it on fries almost made me cry.
Chuck Norris is an open minded man. He is also a little heterosexual, and has a huge penis.
Chuck Norris is an angry angry badger. He is also a mid-range telephone, and has an intriguing life philosophy.
Brokeback Mountain is what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.
@...greenie: lolwut?
Was the whole Chuck Norris thing ever actually funny?
If so, explain.
@...flintlocke:
With nothing more than his bare hands and keen intellect, Chuck Norris has killed, maimed, and brutalized hundreds of Hollywood careers. After his fight scene with Chuck Norris, martial arts legend Bruce Lee died. Jonathan Brandis, who starred in Norris’ Sidekicks, was reduced to acting opposite a talking dolphin and became an hero when he was cut from Hart’s War.
Chuck Norris Facts is a prototypical funny old meme that most people grudgingly like. The joke is a rip-off of similar jokes about Wise Beard Man. Since Norris’ old movies are based on the premise that he has a superhuman ability to kick dirty foreigner ass, the Facts exaggerate these lofty abilities to epically unlulzy proportions. At least 100 years ago, there was a time everybody enjoyed Chuck Norris jokes.
And if Chuck Norris Facts have never made you laugh, not even once, you simply need to smoke more weed.
This was Chuck Norris Facts 101 with dieA. Every Saturday at 9am. Tune in next time!
*Coca Cola commercial*
@...flintlocke:
those lesson confuse you, here is my teachings:
www.timegate.com/forum/showthread.php?t=11603
*tropicana orange juice commercial*
@...ColombianMonkey:
Dude, fuck you. Everyone knows your show is sponsored by them fundamentalist environmentalists pussies & co.
Besides, we got Albert the scientist, and Andrew the friendly reptile.
Pffffft.
atleast *eye roll* our pussies care!. rather than your cocaine in a bottle druglaw.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/04/12/cocaine_case.jpg
company who play monopoly with the world trying to control ever damn beverage and spreading corruption in everything they associate with.
Besides, we got post-modern hippies with all the cannabis & psychedelic mushrooms we want. so booya!
Pah! I AM a post-modern hippie. But yea, a clever one, taking over the world is the most basic thing on our list.
Haha, your cannabis ain’t got no shit on our caffeine.
And where else do you see scientists and reptiles mingle
It’s when they sniff white powder, to feel the tingle
Round and round goes the jingle
Notice the error in intellectual terrorists
Stealing minds and they ain’t need no fists
When mountains explode and even Goliath resists
Your chemicals are weak and so are your priorities
Now follow us or go down on your knees
@...dieAntagonista: wow and i thought vanilla ice – ice ice baby was the worst. i think you need to recheck your status if you claim that your a post-modern hippie lol
@...ColombianMonkey:
Are you dissing my rhymes. Do you know what they call people who diss someone’s rhymes without throwing some rhymes back? You obviously didn’t get any of it. Or you would understand how a post-modern hippie could take over the world.
Yo, your credibility has just hit the bottom of the barrel. Can you hear the echo? Echo echo.
i’ll let me silence speaks it’s volumes, it’s a shame that i think of other people before me or i woulda put you in your place.
Echo echo. . .
it’s okay dieA you could say as you play, i’m just being the bigger person here so yea.
I always thought the whole Chuck Norris meme was kinda silly, but I have to admit that made lol.
I don’t really think Tabasco is suppose to be “hot,” as much as it’s just suppose to add a little flavor. But, I don’t really like the flavor compared to Frank’s.
@...Vent: i think the one with jack from “24” is worse man but thats my opinion.
If anyone wants my opinion, I believe that Steven Segal would win in a fight to the death.
Personally, I think Terence Hill would just shoot the motherfucker. And he’s the fastest also, not even ninjas would have a chance.
And then there’s also McGyver. Obviously he wouldn’t have any chance against Bruce motherfucking Lee, or Steven Segal even, but he’s got the brains! My father always said that the brain is the only muscle you need to be unbeatable. I just realised my father knows a lot of cheesy one liners. But it sounds so darn convincing.
@...dieAntagonista: Thats cause mcGyver would build a bomb out of that bottle of sauce,an odereater,3 toothpicks, and chewing gum. sit back and BOOM. even The Bruce would have a hard time with that.
@...SumoSnipe: McGyver is truly awesome *tear*
@...SumoSnipe: Haha exactly. Ah the memories. And the mullet.
BRAINS FTMFW
This is phail. That isn’t even a real hot sauce…