These might look like artists posed with non-human animals, either hired from Hollywood wranglers or basically harrassed spontaneously on some farm, but that’s not what is going on at all. Each of these features non-human animal artists in their own right. Clockwise from top left:

1) Shag Connors was a Hereford bull who was born with legs that looked oddly like human els in a bull suit. The farming family where he grew up taught him to tapdance and beatbox. Far from being a novetly act, Shag toured internationally with his band The Carrot Crunchers and was instrumental in influencing early hip hop, especially Grandmaster Flash. You can hear samples of three of Shags’s stomachs on the seminal classic, The Message.

2) Stuckey was the pony, and Murray was her unicorn identity. Look into any Otherkin’s family bestiary and you’ll find Stuckey and Murray, who are like the Liza Minelli and Judy Garland entertainer inspiration of the gay community in terms of star power influence, except with more geneaology and soul-sharing. The guys are stablehands who the recod label felt were necessary, much to Stuckey and Murray’s ire, to soften what they described as “too horny by half and a bit weird”. The title was changed, too, from “Mythical hornication”, which really pissed the groundbreaking artist(s) off.

3) Paul Jones is the pig. No, the dog, no, the bunny… much like that scene in spartacus, this is how the five of them evaded being killed one Christmas when Farmer Miggins came out and called “Paul Jones!?!”, wicked knife in hand. “I’m Paul Jones!”, which Miggins quickly realised had incredible A Capella potential and taught them all a few tunes. Here he is with the clown paint. The guy in the middle is Paul Jones the bantam rooster, with some make-up on. Amazing how a comb-over transforms one’s features, isn’t it?

4) Bent Fabric, a cheeky fellow even by Capuchin monkey standards, was a close firend of Tom waits and played on Frank’s Wild Years. He wrote “Telephone Call from Istanbul” and can be heard on that track shaking his peanuts in their shells maracas like there’s no tomorrow. Bent died of an overdose of heroin-laced bananas, with a smile on his face. just like the one he wore on stage organ grinding.

5) Big Bear on the left. Slightly Smaller Bear, his less talented and overshadowed brother who also held him together and went on to make a lot of money in spa pools in the late 90s, on the right. Big Bear had a tumour shaped like a man growing out of his shoulder, which he rocked in grizzly style. It killed him eventually, due to gold chains Big Bear decorated it with catching in an overhead fan and maybe that was really crack it sure sounds implausible, even the cornoner thought so but couldn’t be sure due to not having a veterinary degree. Oh and two other bears there, Muscle Bears. This was LA, after all.

6) Lastly Lane “Mc Ribs” Steinberg and his magical pony, Nobs McGee. Nobs McGee had tiny arms and hands. Lane had hoped the Pegasus wings would distract from this, but they didn’t and the sleeve had to be sold wrapped in brown paper because it gave everyone who saw it nightmares. Lane was sensitive about his small stature, and liked that Nobs measured him at 34 hands tall, when the standard hands topped him out at 10. Why was Nobs a pony? Before there was Mr Hands, there was Nobs McGee. Really, it’s about the music, right, in this case, music so cool Sonic Youth count Lane as a major influnece.

Non-human animal artists died out in the early 90s due to video and the rise of the conventionally sexy star, as well as tightening quarantine laws worldwide which meant they couldn’t tour without huge hassles. They are one of the few non-human animal forms of commercialism that PETA supports. have a listen to Paul Jones’ rendition of “Banana Boat Song” and you will see why.