I would make that Kessel run in twelve parsecs…wait…

“Chanel, hey ‘sup? Hey, listen… I know this is a shitty way to do this but we’re just not going to need you today. Or really any other time for the foreseeable future. You know the used book market is just shitty right now and we just *have* to cut back somewhere. And it fuckin’ *sucks* that it’s gotta be you. I mean… you’re the newest employee and all that… Aw yeah… I know, I know; if fuckin’ sucks.

Look I’ll call up Tag down at the Hawt Kup and see if he can’t get you some hours. I know, right… he’s so fuckin’ cool like that. I’m *sure* he’ll work out some kinda deal withya… I mean… he’s seen your modeling photos and everything.

Anyway… peace and namaste, bitch! Let’s get fuuuuuuuuck’d UP this weekend and feed our cooches! YOLO!”