I’m sure no one will believe me, so I don’t know why even I’m posting this, but:
I fucked her.
It was almost exactly a year ago. I was visiting a friend who makes prawn based snacks in Scotland. We went out to a Glasgow bar (which is one of the few non-prawn based activities I do well.) After dancing a bit, she told me her name and there was a prawn, like I should be impressed, and she said, “you know, the expensive place where gay soldiers wear bear skin hats and people say ‘gosh’ and ‘blimey’ and set fire to things when things don’t go their way?”. And was I was like, “Yeah, I’m feeling prawny right now.” and she laughed. So ended up going back to my friend’s apartment, drank some wine, then he asked his girlfriend to join us, and well…started making prawn based snacks!
Anyway, I didn’t realize who she was until I got home and tried to look up her number online on the prawn based index database.
I think I’ve still got some picture on my old cell phone. I’ll check when I get home.