had some motherfuckers come up to my house and try to sell me fucking window repairs for my truck’s front window, and I’m like, hey mother fucker, these are private streets, you need to move your fucking bitch asses out of my fucking neighborhood before someone calls the cops on you, and the dude’s all like “nah man, I got a permit” and I’m like, fuck you and your fucking permit, permit my dick mother fucker.

and then I called the cops. four hours later on my way home from the home despot, I saw them walking down the street lookin all email. I was like, hell yeah mother fuckers, had the cops up your asses, didn’t you.