Now, Earl’s got a daughter, and they call her Effie-Sue. And Effie-Sue, she don’t look so much like a little girl, as she looks like a… a big pile of fungus. Earl blames this, too, on the fact that St. Smithen’s Medical Facility has been dumpin’ on his maggot farm. And, I never had
much contact with Essie… Effie-Sue. Excuse me, I don’t even think
that much of her to get her name right. I never had much contact with
her. She just normally just sits on the couch like a little ball of
fungus and just… boils away. Well, one day, she looked at me, and
that little ball of fungus opened its mouth (or what I guess was its
mouth – I’d hate to think what else it could be), and out of that
orifice floated the words, “Didja ever go to make a… a pork sausage
and find it’s got hair all over it?”, and then that… that little pile of fungus gave me a look that chills me to this day.