TAKE the surgery.
Here’s why:
The longer I’m on the planet- the better it is for everyone else.
Call it ego, call it insanity, call it plain nonsense, anyone on the planet who interacts with me in any way, shape, or form will see a significant improvement in their quality of life.
Don’t worry guys- you get some too.
So yeah- I’m not just intelligent and funny- I’m ineffably awesome, and can’t, in good conscience, deprive the world of that.
P.S. Maybe I’m a megalomaniac, but I promise: *This is what Jake Walker actually believes*
But I will be your doctor, of course, and i will prescribe you something to make the awesome go away. And you will take it. Because you got the surgery. That made you retarded. Enjoy.
@...Dr.Devine: Not that I’d give you the opportunity, but only a Dr. who has sworn to uphold a hypocritic oath, could prescribe medications that would sap the last vestiges of radiated awesome from a human vegetable…
Easy: I don’t care if she exists, if I distract myself with that sort of thing, I get lost in logic chains for bloody weeks.
And IF she did, she would be “devinely” hot.
And hopefully, if it was proven she existed, everyone would start worshipping her. I mean, she is a goddess. If force like that exists in the universe, I wouldn’t be one to fuck with it.
4. Genetic engineers at Johns Hopkins University announce that they have developed a so-called “super gorilla.” Though the animal cannot speak, it has a sign language lexicon of over twelve thousand words, an I.Q. of almost 85, and–most notably–a vague sense of self-awareness. Oddly, the creature (who weighs seven hundred pounds) becomes fascinated by football. The gorilla aspires to play the game at its highest level and quickly develops the rudimentary skills of a defensive end. ESPN analyst Tom Jackson speculates that this gorilla would be “borderline unblockable” and would likely average six sacks a game (although Jackson concedes the beast might be susceptible to counters and misdirection plays). Meanwhile, the gorilla has made it clear he would never intentionally injure any opponent.
You are commissioner of the NFL: Would you allow this gorilla to sign with the Oakland Raiders?
I’m gonna say No. While I would love to tic PETA off in that fashion, and the gorrilla would arguably probably be more gentle than your average player, the nature of the game is such that injuries will happen.
The potential damage that a sack by a 700lb Gorrilla could accidentally cause, to a even a large offensive lineman, just isn’t worth the risk…
well no
because the question of doom isnt finish
and im giving people a chance to awnser
but let me know and i could hook you up with the next on the list
SumoSnipe (#4452)
16 years ago
No no have not given up yet, was just sidetracked by all the movie memories…
That’s quite a lisp you have developed there,nobody knows. Is that where all the rum has gone?
8. You meet the perfect person. Romantically, this person is ideal: You find them physically attractive, intellectually stimulating, consistently funny, and deeply compassionate. However, they have one quirk: This individual is obsessed with Jim Henson’s gothic puppet fantasy The Dark Crystal. Beyond watching it on DVD at least once a month, he/she peppers casual conversation with Dark Crystal references, uses Dark Crystal analogies to explain everyday events, and occasionally likes to talk intensely about the film’s “deeper philosophy.”
Would this be enough to stop you from marrying this individual?
@...Dr.Devine: Well, truth be told, if an obsession with The Dark Crystal was the ONLY thing wrong with this otherwise perfect woman of my dreams, she would probably break up with me before it ever got that far.
I have far more debilitating neuroses, in comparison to an obsession with what is actually a quite interesting movie. Even if it does feature muppet actors…
@Phyreblade: if she’s the woman of your dreams, she wouldn’t break up with you, as she is the woman of your dreams. Unless one of your debilitating neuroses involves dreaming of a woman you instantly fall in love with, and then leaves you flat on your face. In which case…. enjoy.
And I get your point… but I like to think of them as enjoyable personality quirks. If I didn’t have any, I’d just be a boring guy, who, while stunningly goodlooking, would have a completely flat personality. At which point, I would go into male modeling, and start fucking a rough trip named jack. hooray.
SumoSnipe (#4452)
16 years ago
Would that stop me? No. My current GF on the other hand, would stop me. Repeatedly. With a heavy blunt object. @...Dr.Devine: your posts have inextricably linked my mental image of you to John Malkovich in Dangerous Liaisons. Such an elegant rake.
I’m with Phyreblade on this one. Quirky is my middle name, but I think I’m pretty charming about it so I don’t see it as a problem. So no, I’d marry him anyway.
@...Dr.Devine:
“Unless one of your debilitating neuroses involves dreaming of a woman you instantly fall in love with, and then leaves you flat on your face” – Story of my life. No but seriously, isn’t this called being human? They always want what they can’t have right.
I never call anyone back, so when someone does that to me – I fall even more for that person. Arrogance is sexy.
It used to be pretty bad with me though. One year ago I fell so easily in love with people because of that, it was enough if someone gave me the evil look and I was certain I found my future husband.
@...dieAntagonista: Why do so many women do that? Every single one of my female friends and family have gone through a phase of falling head over heels in 24 hours to a prick. Then, when the prick acts like a prick, it breaks their heart. I’ve never done that, though I did meet hubby when I was 16, so I fell in love w/ the right guy early on.
@...nyokki: Wow, when you were 16?! Seriously? I applaud you for that.
I know it’s true and you’re right. Like I said, I think it’s because what you can’t seem to have seems just that more attractive.
On the other hand, I don’t think I fall for pricks, just for people that don’t seem to like me. Ahaha. I like nerdy guys. Because I’m nerdy.The more intelligent and arrogant someone is, the more I want them.
If he knows more digits of pi than me, chances are I want to have his babies.
@...nyokki: ” Why do so many women do that? Every single one of my female friends and family have gone through a phase of falling head over heels in 24 hours to a prick.”
It’s called planning and experience ? xD
-sorry but im laughing so hard .. not about this but a resemblance of a website i visited not long ago .. female author and talks about this kind of stuff here is the link -> www.collegecandy.com/sex
nevertheless i enjoy reading this. because this is from a woman’s though and perspective. and maybe it’s just me but it brings me 1 step closer to understanding women. and like my dad always says:” never worry about the “kind” of knowledge but concentrate on the quantity.
Eh, I was in agreement with the answer he gave, just not the premise that he’d get left. I like to think love be stronger than that… At least for me it was. I was just attacking the idea that the ideal person would still break your heart in half. 😉 In which case, they aren’t really the ideal, are they?
@dieAntagonista:3.1415926535897
I think thats decently impressive… 😀
And as for liking guys that don’t like you back… thats a terrible excuse. 😉 There is no way that should fly with you.. ever. haha. Even if that starts off true, trust me, it almost always can be changed. 😉 There is no such thing as a permanent “I don’t like you”, especially with guys. Unless you do something mean to them…. like… shit… I think the only thing that might work is chopping off their juevos and throwing it into a vacant lot… and even then, if you were really sorry… 😉 And further more on the whole, “not calling people back thing”…. Your a lady, you get away with that sorta thing. 😉 And arrogance is dead sexy. @SumoSnipe: I’m much better looking than John Malkovich. And certainly at least ten years younger than he was in that movie. Though I approve of the man whore reference, to bluntly summarize the character. I do come off like that to lots of people. 😉
@nyokki: Dead on, majority of guys are pricks. Whether or not they want to be. I try to be much nicer. But even then, I’ve been a complete prick a couple times… Usually not intentionally. @MonkeyHitman: Classic. Bloody classic.
I think it may be time for the next question…
@...Dr.Devine: Well heck, if she’s that perfect, a little thing like an obsession with muppet theater would just be a charming little quirk in my book…
And unlike in Nyokkis case, would affect the frequency of sex very little, if at all… But then again, I’m a guy, so that’s not saying much… 😀
@...nyokki:
Sadly, I find the most women don’t really understand why they do this either. I think it has something to do with getting caught up entirely in an emotion, without the benefit of any form of intellectual moderation.
The arrogant affect of a jerk, includes, as a matter of course, a massive quantity of self confidence. This, at a subconscious level, is often found very attractive to a lot of women, as it is also one of the trademarks of a successful predator.
As I understand it, this translates into an instinctive desire for them to submit to such a person, as they inspire feelings of safety, security, etc. within them when they are with him.
Of course, the reality is that confidence and arrogance are not the same, and while they may ostensibly appear similar, the distinguishing signs are there if you are looking hard enough. But it takes some conscious analytical thought, which by that point, has pretty much been overridden by a process akin to amygdalic hijacking…
@...MonkeyHitman: ROFL… That was priceless… And refreshingly honest too…
SumoSnipe (#4452)
16 years ago
@...nyokki: I don’t get the whole attracted to jackasses thing. My female friends normally have their heads on straight, but damn, one bad boy glance,2 weeks of wooo hoo that turns into 3 months of no show and then I get the hey rube! gotta go in clean up the mess and wish the damn volcanoes here were still active so I could toss badboy in….ARRRRGGGGG sorry. Sore topic.
the reason is simple: women are attracted to men who make them feel singular- one-in-a-million, and I don’t mean via flattery (though it can be wielded). When they see a man who is cool, aloof, rugged, withdrawn (emotionally), suave and charming (but only to keep emotions at an arm’s length) or any combination of these, they see the potential to make themselves the special one and only that could reach out and get through to him, thus making her the one-in a million.
(Sadly many girls have a separate problem- they have their own flawed understanding of self worth, and the act of being mistreated by someone they are attracted to validates their way of thinking which makes them feel secure- everything in the world is as it should be.)
The funny thing about the first type is that most nerds or geeks or dorks or whatever you want to call them fit into [whichever term you picked]-hood because they are passionate about something- from Tribbles to Tapdancing, Kirk to Kurosawa. This means that at the very least, this individual has made an emotional connection with something, and values it above the opinions of the general public. Of course, [BLANK]ery isn’t a dating stamp of approval- some of the worst “boyfriend is a dick” stories my ladies have shared have been with passionate artists and the like, but women would be better off starting the search in a [Nerd Herd, Geek Fleet, Dork. . .Pack?] than at a club that doesn’t let people with Chuck T’s get in.
Once I got past the circular troll battle, I really got a lot out of reading this thread; DieAntagonista and MonkeyHitman have connected me to some good new music, I’ve done a wee bit of google-stalking and fallen mad in lust with DieAntagonista’s luscious lips, and am totally digging on those questions which have provide me with a lot of insight into many of the people whom I am coming to consider valuable eFriends. I will give my belated answers, for what they’re worth:
(I know I’m long winded, I’m sorry)
1: Since “Real Magic” simply is a technique, science, or technology we do not yet understand, and Einstein was advancing our understanding of the universe, I find him much more impressive. Anyone can destroy a coin and breeding rabbits isn’t hard. We have a ‘run’ here, and it should be mentioned that rabbits alone do not provide the needed human dietary intake. Plus, rabbits multiply like… rabbits and an ecological disaster worse than wild pigs in Oz would ensue.
2: I would kiss the horse upon his nose and match my breathing to it, commune deeply with it’s spirit, and then separate it from it’s body as quick as I could, and let it’s flesh be shared amongst the hungry. Life feeds on life. One death for the freedom of many is always worth it. Good or bad doesn’t mean much to me. I believe criminals should be punished with public floggings or executions and jails should not ever exist. I’d rather be tortured for a few minutes and learn my harsh lesson immediately than be incarcerated for a year to brood and harden. I choose Freedom or Death. No living being should ever be caged. If it isn’t fit for freedom and won’t learn from pain, it doesn’t belong in this world. But I would kill the horse, love him as I might, because I know there is -existence- before birth and after death. As far as the horse being restrained: it only makes it easier on it, as it restricts the suffering of death throes and makes the (likely repeated) blows of the foot quicker and thus more merciful.
3: The Hitler skull, easy. This question amounted to “+$120 bucks per month, or keep an amphibion in a clear box for two years. See above for my views on incarceration, which apply to all living beings.
6: My family members are the first people I talk with, rapidly and vividly, about my dreams anyway. I rely on their wisdom for insight already so there is no reason I wouldn’t want my family to see my dreams. It would deepen their understanding of me, and enhance our relationship.
9: Well, since I am already openly bisexual, I would read the book if it came to me, but since it only had middling reviews, I wouldn’t seek it out with much vehemence unless a friend recommended it.
17: I can’t really answer this question, simply not enough info for me. In person I trust people based on their aura and my sensory info from them not on just what an “acquaintance” might say about them. My best friends can talk shit about someone and I remain neutral to them until I meet them in person. If I had to make a snap decision without seeing or sensing either in anyway, I’d flip a coin.
Then elzarco’s question; flight, without pause. Recklessly even. If I can’t masturbate or communicate I’d rather be dead.
11: I’d leave instantly. I know from personal experience that when I have an intuitive feeling about death in the family it is real. Wouldn’t matter if the death was inevitable. The cheap thrill of a flashy movie is worthless to me, compared to my mom. Even if I was beyond easy transport to her, I’d be jenny-on-the-spot with communication with her, or the rest of family and arranging any necessary travel logistics.
13: Oh gosh, my speech would be about how great they all are, how awesome this world is, how blessed I have been, and how the ensuing orgy will best commence. Getting all my lovers in one room with me as the center of attention is basically my idea of paradise. Just set the banquet somewhere tropical
15: Wow, For the six months I would be high on MDMA and THC almost continually, with a variance of other enhancements to the non-stop sex marathon I would organize. On the last day I’d skydive without a parachute. I choose quality over quantity.
4: Hell yes
8: Hell no. I’d even make some suitable costumes to play along with his/her fantasy.
I can’t really comment on the guy topic here at the present, to my dismay. I’m not really a good example of normal girls though. There are only three guys I can think of with whom I wasn’t the dominant force in the relationship, and all of them were unique cases.
Here’s hoping my long, pushed-in comment doesn’t cripple this amazing thread.
@...sylvanish: your post have enlighten others to start posting more !!
so good job. *thumps Up*
SumoSnipe (#4452)
16 years ago
@...sylvanish: I am starting to believe that “normal girls” just do not come to play here at [mcs]. Just the exceptional ones. Google-stalking,eh? New phrase for my lexicon. Hey! that make 2 new phrases I have learned from this site in less than 24 hours! This is the kind of continuing education I like.
@...Dr.Devine:
Nah I do like being liked. It only works if that person knows nothing about me but doesn’t seem to like me. Or thinks they’re superior to me – easiest way to drive me crazy.
As for the digits, nice, very nice. Though I won’t tell you if those were more or less than I know. :p
@...sylvanish:
After taking into consideration everything you said, I have come to the conclusion that you need to have sex with me. Nao.
Answer number two was easily the most impressive. Number 15 is exactly what I would do, but as for the drugs I’d include DMT, salvia and Mexican mushrooms.
Also, in case anyone is wondering what the purpose of these questions is – this guy Chuck is an atheist and in one of his books he included these 23 questions. He wrote that if he wants to find out if he could truly love someone, he/she would have to answer his 23 questions of doom.
Oh and sorry about me not asking the questions in order. I would have never thought you could find out so much about people by asking these seemingly coincidental questions.
@...dieAntagonista: if i’m bored out of my mind i shall make 23 questions of doom, but as i notice i need your brains also, and yes… Dr.Devine u can help too.
and i never notice this is for it. but anyhow let’s continue
12. You meet a wizard in downtown Chicago. The wizard tells you he can make you more attractive if you pay him money. When you ask how this process works, the wizard points to a random person on the street. You look at this random stranger. The wizard says, “I will now make them a dollar more attractive.” He waves his magic wand. Ostensibly, this person does not change at all; as far as you can tell, nothing is different. But–somehow–this person is suddenly a little more appealing. The tangible difference is invisible to the naked eye, but you can’t deny that this person is vaguely sexier. This wizard has a weird rule, though–you can only pay him once. You can’t keep giving him money until you’re satisfied. You can only pay him one lump sum up front.
How much cash do you give the wizard?
__________________________________________________
off note:
i have been noticing that women are more seemingly attractive to Bisexuals why is that? if you take out the “sex extra fun” what more is left behind.
@...MonkeyHitman: You mean women are more likely to be bisexual than men? If so, I can only speak for myself but I have found that people like people that look similar to them. And if you have a healthy mind you’re not grossed out by your own body, so why should you be grossed out by another woman’s body. I’ve never had sex with a woman though, so it’s all in the mind anyway. I also like drawing them. In fact I can only draw women.
But yeah you also have to consider the fact that gay and bisexual men are way less accepted by society than women who are gay/bi.
I’ve never been attracted to another woman. I’ve nothing against it, and if I did find myself attracted to another woman, I might act on it. It’s just never happened.
Oh and I don’t think I’d pay. I’m convinced that there is always something you have to give up in order to gain and I don’t know what my deal w/ the devil would really require.
Well, to put it simply… I just hit it off more with women. I am heavily attracted to, and love women, while really all I have for guys is sort of affection and raw attraction.And most of them find the honesty startling.
Also: I like to think the ladies get a combo pack: gay best friend to go shopping with, and nice guy to take you to dinner. 😉 No to mention.. guys are kinda dicks. And its lots easier to find straight chicks than it is to find gay guys. More of a statistics thing.
haha
Happy birthday monkey!
or in three days happy birthday.. whatever.
@question: I’d go drop out my savings account, which is sizable, and here is why: if a dollar makes you subtly sexier, then the contents of my bank account will probably turn me into some kind of sex god, which would then give me a distinct advantage over every human being I came in contact with. Overnight, I would be able to simply collect money just by existing. Not to mention I’d enjoy being chased nearly continuously by every woman in direct proximity, as I’d probably develop phermones by a certain point. Probably around the $10,000 dollar point…
@...dieAntagonista: actually no i ment that women seems to like bi’s somewhat more then straight men, ofcourse im not saying all but there is a hefty amount that do.
Though I don’t really think that I need to alter who I am as a person, I definitely would not mind altering myself to gain near infinite power. Really, I’m just egomaniacal. 😀 Not as bad as natedog, but wouldn’t mind gaining that kind of boost in the charisma category at all.
@ladies: he was asking why ladies found bisexual guys more attractive than regular dudes… i believe. I dunno. @MonkeyHitman: Clarify!
@...Dr.Devine: Haha no way. You would really do that? Do you really think you could handle being some sort of a star. Privacy is way too important to me. Besides I’m vain enough as it is, so if I were to pay him everything I got I doubt I’d keep learning the way I do now. Mind > Attractiveness
@...MonkeyHitman: Ow. Actually, I have never met a gay or bisexual man. Or maybe I did, but didn’t know it. I don’t think I’m any more attracted to bi men than to straight men, but it’s exciting to hear that there a men who aren’t ‘afraid’ of being bi. I’m sure there are a bunch of bi men out there who would never admit to it, so they date only women.
@...MonkeyHitman: Oh yea and of course I know deviantart. Unfortunately I’m too self-absorbed to upload my drawings on there. I mean I appreciate good art by other people, but not when my art has to compete with a bazillion other drawings.
I’m just an amateur anyway.
@...ColombianMonkey: I was just gonna ask if you’re MonkeyHitman’s long lost brother.
Haha yes they do say a lot of positive things, but should your art be even slightly morbid – there are a bunch of people who will spam your comments until you lose your mind. Thanks but no thanks.
Oh my fucking god. I love that Mad TV episode.
“The back of yo head is RIDICULOUS.”
I used to watch that video at least 3 times ever day.
also, 701.
just because i can
TAKE the surgery.
Here’s why:
The longer I’m on the planet- the better it is for everyone else.
Call it ego, call it insanity, call it plain nonsense, anyone on the planet who interacts with me in any way, shape, or form will see a significant improvement in their quality of life.
Don’t worry guys- you get some too.
So yeah- I’m not just intelligent and funny- I’m ineffably awesome, and can’t, in good conscience, deprive the world of that.
P.S. Maybe I’m a megalomaniac, but I promise: *This is what Jake Walker actually believes*
Wow. You realize that the surgery also drains the awesome out of you, right?
all the conscious awesome, perhaps- but the sheer magic of my existence remains as long as I do
you would be just a human blob … you still want that surgery ?
yup. I’d still radiate.
But I will be your doctor, of course, and i will prescribe you something to make the awesome go away. And you will take it. Because you got the surgery. That made you retarded. Enjoy.
@...Dr.Devine: Not that I’d give you the opportunity, but only a Dr. who has sworn to uphold a hypocritic oath, could prescribe medications that would sap the last vestiges of radiated awesome from a human vegetable…
You’re cruel man, Dr. Grinch…
someone has to do it …
lol
Well, yeah…. I still resembl…er…. resent that.
Yawn. Next question?
Is there a female god? if so how hot would she be?
And how many people would start worshiping her?
Easy: I don’t care if she exists, if I distract myself with that sort of thing, I get lost in logic chains for bloody weeks.
And IF she did, she would be “devinely” hot.
And hopefully, if it was proven she existed, everyone would start worshipping her. I mean, she is a goddess. If force like that exists in the universe, I wouldn’t be one to fuck with it.
Is there a female God: By archaic definition, no. By modern definition, God would be genderless.
My preference: Yes. And she would be smoking hot, real, and spectacular.
As for worship, a vast majority of the guys, and probably a decent percentage of the gals would worship her imho…
“‘Mother’ is the name of God in the hearts and minds of children”
One of my favorite lines from The Crow.
4. Genetic engineers at Johns Hopkins University announce that they have developed a so-called “super gorilla.” Though the animal cannot speak, it has a sign language lexicon of over twelve thousand words, an I.Q. of almost 85, and–most notably–a vague sense of self-awareness. Oddly, the creature (who weighs seven hundred pounds) becomes fascinated by football. The gorilla aspires to play the game at its highest level and quickly develops the rudimentary skills of a defensive end. ESPN analyst Tom Jackson speculates that this gorilla would be “borderline unblockable” and would likely average six sacks a game (although Jackson concedes the beast might be susceptible to counters and misdirection plays). Meanwhile, the gorilla has made it clear he would never intentionally injure any opponent.
You are commissioner of the NFL: Would you allow this gorilla to sign with the Oakland Raiders?
Quick answer? No. The gorilla would obviously have an advantage, which PETA wouldn’t like…wait…new answer. YES!
To Oakland? But my Bengals need him more!
@...nyokki: LOL I c whut u did there…
I’m gonna say No. While I would love to tic PETA off in that fashion, and the gorrilla would arguably probably be more gentle than your average player, the nature of the game is such that injuries will happen.
The potential damage that a sack by a 700lb Gorrilla could accidentally cause, to a even a large offensive lineman, just isn’t worth the risk…
no- make him a commentator
@...elzarcothepale: WIN
Yes. Because. It. Would. Be. Fucking. Awesome.
I would actually watch football. And that gorilla would be amazing.
@elzarcothepale: +100 internets.
its not a gorilla but you get the point !
i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb8/djrhymez/cobain.jpg
since this such a godly topic i think i’d give 4chan though
i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb8/djrhymez/4chan-explains-the-bible.png
@MonkeyHitman:Epic lolz
what? no more post do i get the final word?
@...nobody knows: Yes.
@...nyokki:
^
I got the last word bithes!!!!
well no
because the question of doom isnt finish
and im giving people a chance to awnser
but let me know and i could hook you up with the next on the list
No no have not given up yet, was just sidetracked by all the movie memories…
That’s quite a lisp you have developed there,nobody knows. Is that where all the rum has gone?
good good
Indeed. I would rather we moved on, but if we need to wait, fine by me.
8. You meet the perfect person. Romantically, this person is ideal: You find them physically attractive, intellectually stimulating, consistently funny, and deeply compassionate. However, they have one quirk: This individual is obsessed with Jim Henson’s gothic puppet fantasy The Dark Crystal. Beyond watching it on DVD at least once a month, he/she peppers casual conversation with Dark Crystal references, uses Dark Crystal analogies to explain everyday events, and occasionally likes to talk intensely about the film’s “deeper philosophy.”
Would this be enough to stop you from marrying this individual?
@...MonkeyHitman:
Would that stop me? HELL NO!
Uh…. Fuck no? I mean… It would probably lead to our divorce later on, but thats kind of eventual anyways…
@...Dr.Devine: Well, truth be told, if an obsession with The Dark Crystal was the ONLY thing wrong with this otherwise perfect woman of my dreams, she would probably break up with me before it ever got that far.
I have far more debilitating neuroses, in comparison to an obsession with what is actually a quite interesting movie. Even if it does feature muppet actors…
@Phyreblade: if she’s the woman of your dreams, she wouldn’t break up with you, as she is the woman of your dreams. Unless one of your debilitating neuroses involves dreaming of a woman you instantly fall in love with, and then leaves you flat on your face. In which case…. enjoy.
And I get your point… but I like to think of them as enjoyable personality quirks. If I didn’t have any, I’d just be a boring guy, who, while stunningly goodlooking, would have a completely flat personality. At which point, I would go into male modeling, and start fucking a rough trip named jack. hooray.
Would that stop me? No. My current GF on the other hand, would stop me. Repeatedly. With a heavy blunt object.
@...Dr.Devine: your posts have inextricably linked my mental image of you to John Malkovich in Dangerous Liaisons. Such an elegant rake.
:\
Would it keep me from marrying him? No. It might keep him from having regular sex though. ;<)
I’m with Phyreblade on this one. Quirky is my middle name, but I think I’m pretty charming about it so I don’t see it as a problem. So no, I’d marry him anyway.
@...Dr.Devine:
“Unless one of your debilitating neuroses involves dreaming of a woman you instantly fall in love with, and then leaves you flat on your face” – Story of my life. No but seriously, isn’t this called being human? They always want what they can’t have right.
I never call anyone back, so when someone does that to me – I fall even more for that person. Arrogance is sexy.
It used to be pretty bad with me though. One year ago I fell so easily in love with people because of that, it was enough if someone gave me the evil look and I was certain I found my future husband.
@...nyokki: Haha, right on.
@...dieAntagonista: Why do so many women do that? Every single one of my female friends and family have gone through a phase of falling head over heels in 24 hours to a prick. Then, when the prick acts like a prick, it breaks their heart. I’ve never done that, though I did meet hubby when I was 16, so I fell in love w/ the right guy early on.
@...nyokki: Wow, when you were 16?! Seriously? I applaud you for that.
I know it’s true and you’re right. Like I said, I think it’s because what you can’t seem to have seems just that more attractive.
On the other hand, I don’t think I fall for pricks, just for people that don’t seem to like me. Ahaha. I like nerdy guys. Because I’m nerdy.The more intelligent and arrogant someone is, the more I want them.
If he knows more digits of pi than me, chances are I want to have his babies.
@...nyokki: ” Why do so many women do that? Every single one of my female friends and family have gone through a phase of falling head over heels in 24 hours to a prick.”
It’s called planning and experience ? xD
-sorry but im laughing so hard .. not about this but a resemblance of a website i visited not long ago .. female author and talks about this kind of stuff here is the link -> www.collegecandy.com/sex
nevertheless i enjoy reading this. because this is from a woman’s though and perspective. and maybe it’s just me but it brings me 1 step closer to understanding women. and like my dad always says:” never worry about the “kind” of knowledge but concentrate on the quantity.
Eh, I was in agreement with the answer he gave, just not the premise that he’d get left. I like to think love be stronger than that… At least for me it was. I was just attacking the idea that the ideal person would still break your heart in half. 😉 In which case, they aren’t really the ideal, are they?
@dieAntagonista:3.1415926535897
I think thats decently impressive… 😀
And as for liking guys that don’t like you back… thats a terrible excuse. 😉 There is no way that should fly with you.. ever. haha. Even if that starts off true, trust me, it almost always can be changed. 😉 There is no such thing as a permanent “I don’t like you”, especially with guys. Unless you do something mean to them…. like… shit… I think the only thing that might work is chopping off their juevos and throwing it into a vacant lot… and even then, if you were really sorry… 😉 And further more on the whole, “not calling people back thing”…. Your a lady, you get away with that sorta thing. 😉 And arrogance is dead sexy.
@SumoSnipe: I’m much better looking than John Malkovich. And certainly at least ten years younger than he was in that movie. Though I approve of the man whore reference, to bluntly summarize the character. I do come off like that to lots of people. 😉
@nyokki: Dead on, majority of guys are pricks. Whether or not they want to be. I try to be much nicer. But even then, I’ve been a complete prick a couple times… Usually not intentionally.
@MonkeyHitman: Classic. Bloody classic.
I think it may be time for the next question…
@...Dr.Devine: Well heck, if she’s that perfect, a little thing like an obsession with muppet theater would just be a charming little quirk in my book…
And unlike in Nyokkis case, would affect the frequency of sex very little, if at all… But then again, I’m a guy, so that’s not saying much… 😀
@...nyokki:
Sadly, I find the most women don’t really understand why they do this either. I think it has something to do with getting caught up entirely in an emotion, without the benefit of any form of intellectual moderation.
The arrogant affect of a jerk, includes, as a matter of course, a massive quantity of self confidence. This, at a subconscious level, is often found very attractive to a lot of women, as it is also one of the trademarks of a successful predator.
As I understand it, this translates into an instinctive desire for them to submit to such a person, as they inspire feelings of safety, security, etc. within them when they are with him.
Of course, the reality is that confidence and arrogance are not the same, and while they may ostensibly appear similar, the distinguishing signs are there if you are looking hard enough. But it takes some conscious analytical thought, which by that point, has pretty much been overridden by a process akin to amygdalic hijacking…
@...MonkeyHitman: ROFL… That was priceless… And refreshingly honest too…
@...nyokki: I don’t get the whole attracted to jackasses thing. My female friends normally have their heads on straight, but damn, one bad boy glance,2 weeks of wooo hoo that turns into 3 months of no show and then I get the hey rube! gotta go in clean up the mess and wish the damn volcanoes here were still active so I could toss badboy in….ARRRRGGGGG sorry. Sore topic.
the reason is simple: women are attracted to men who make them feel singular- one-in-a-million, and I don’t mean via flattery (though it can be wielded). When they see a man who is cool, aloof, rugged, withdrawn (emotionally), suave and charming (but only to keep emotions at an arm’s length) or any combination of these, they see the potential to make themselves the special one and only that could reach out and get through to him, thus making her the one-in a million.
(Sadly many girls have a separate problem- they have their own flawed understanding of self worth, and the act of being mistreated by someone they are attracted to validates their way of thinking which makes them feel secure- everything in the world is as it should be.)
The funny thing about the first type is that most nerds or geeks or dorks or whatever you want to call them fit into [whichever term you picked]-hood because they are passionate about something- from Tribbles to Tapdancing, Kirk to Kurosawa. This means that at the very least, this individual has made an emotional connection with something, and values it above the opinions of the general public. Of course, [BLANK]ery isn’t a dating stamp of approval- some of the worst “boyfriend is a dick” stories my ladies have shared have been with passionate artists and the like, but women would be better off starting the search in a [Nerd Herd, Geek Fleet, Dork. . .Pack?] than at a club that doesn’t let people with Chuck T’s get in.
Yes, yes, yes… elzarcothepale is absolutely right. Excellent advice… ;D
@...Phyreblade: I take it you fall into the “Chuck” T category?
I didn’t think I’d like the show, but I do and have watched both seasons.
Once I got past the circular troll battle, I really got a lot out of reading this thread; DieAntagonista and MonkeyHitman have connected me to some good new music, I’ve done a wee bit of google-stalking and fallen mad in lust with DieAntagonista’s luscious lips, and am totally digging on those questions which have provide me with a lot of insight into many of the people whom I am coming to consider valuable eFriends. I will give my belated answers, for what they’re worth:
(I know I’m long winded, I’m sorry)
1: Since “Real Magic” simply is a technique, science, or technology we do not yet understand, and Einstein was advancing our understanding of the universe, I find him much more impressive. Anyone can destroy a coin and breeding rabbits isn’t hard. We have a ‘run’ here, and it should be mentioned that rabbits alone do not provide the needed human dietary intake. Plus, rabbits multiply like… rabbits and an ecological disaster worse than wild pigs in Oz would ensue.
2: I would kiss the horse upon his nose and match my breathing to it, commune deeply with it’s spirit, and then separate it from it’s body as quick as I could, and let it’s flesh be shared amongst the hungry. Life feeds on life. One death for the freedom of many is always worth it. Good or bad doesn’t mean much to me. I believe criminals should be punished with public floggings or executions and jails should not ever exist. I’d rather be tortured for a few minutes and learn my harsh lesson immediately than be incarcerated for a year to brood and harden. I choose Freedom or Death. No living being should ever be caged. If it isn’t fit for freedom and won’t learn from pain, it doesn’t belong in this world. But I would kill the horse, love him as I might, because I know there is -existence- before birth and after death. As far as the horse being restrained: it only makes it easier on it, as it restricts the suffering of death throes and makes the (likely repeated) blows of the foot quicker and thus more merciful.
3: The Hitler skull, easy. This question amounted to “+$120 bucks per month, or keep an amphibion in a clear box for two years. See above for my views on incarceration, which apply to all living beings.
6: My family members are the first people I talk with, rapidly and vividly, about my dreams anyway. I rely on their wisdom for insight already so there is no reason I wouldn’t want my family to see my dreams. It would deepen their understanding of me, and enhance our relationship.
9: Well, since I am already openly bisexual, I would read the book if it came to me, but since it only had middling reviews, I wouldn’t seek it out with much vehemence unless a friend recommended it.
17: I can’t really answer this question, simply not enough info for me. In person I trust people based on their aura and my sensory info from them not on just what an “acquaintance” might say about them. My best friends can talk shit about someone and I remain neutral to them until I meet them in person. If I had to make a snap decision without seeing or sensing either in anyway, I’d flip a coin.
Then elzarco’s question; flight, without pause. Recklessly even. If I can’t masturbate or communicate I’d rather be dead.
11: I’d leave instantly. I know from personal experience that when I have an intuitive feeling about death in the family it is real. Wouldn’t matter if the death was inevitable. The cheap thrill of a flashy movie is worthless to me, compared to my mom. Even if I was beyond easy transport to her, I’d be jenny-on-the-spot with communication with her, or the rest of family and arranging any necessary travel logistics.
13: Oh gosh, my speech would be about how great they all are, how awesome this world is, how blessed I have been, and how the ensuing orgy will best commence. Getting all my lovers in one room with me as the center of attention is basically my idea of paradise. Just set the banquet somewhere tropical
19: “I thought I saw a brown recluse spider there.” To which she would likely jump up and squeal and thank me for erring on the side of caution.
15: Wow, For the six months I would be high on MDMA and THC almost continually, with a variance of other enhancements to the non-stop sex marathon I would organize. On the last day I’d skydive without a parachute. I choose quality over quantity.
4: Hell yes
8: Hell no. I’d even make some suitable costumes to play along with his/her fantasy.
I can’t really comment on the guy topic here at the present, to my dismay. I’m not really a good example of normal girls though. There are only three guys I can think of with whom I wasn’t the dominant force in the relationship, and all of them were unique cases.
Here’s hoping my long, pushed-in comment doesn’t cripple this amazing thread.
^
???????????
@...nobody knows: heheheheheheh
@...sylvanish: your post have enlighten others to start posting more !!
so good job. *thumps Up*
@...sylvanish: I am starting to believe that “normal girls” just do not come to play here at [mcs]. Just the exceptional ones. Google-stalking,eh? New phrase for my lexicon. Hey! that make 2 new phrases I have learned from this site in less than 24 hours! This is the kind of continuing education I like.
normal ? sorry to burst your bubble but normal isn’t real
@...Dr.Devine:
Nah I do like being liked. It only works if that person knows nothing about me but doesn’t seem to like me. Or thinks they’re superior to me – easiest way to drive me crazy.
As for the digits, nice, very nice. Though I won’t tell you if those were more or less than I know. :p
@...sylvanish:
After taking into consideration everything you said, I have come to the conclusion that you need to have sex with me. Nao.
Answer number two was easily the most impressive. Number 15 is exactly what I would do, but as for the drugs I’d include DMT, salvia and Mexican mushrooms.
Also, in case anyone is wondering what the purpose of these questions is – this guy Chuck is an atheist and in one of his books he included these 23 questions. He wrote that if he wants to find out if he could truly love someone, he/she would have to answer his 23 questions of doom.
Oh and sorry about me not asking the questions in order. I would have never thought you could find out so much about people by asking these seemingly coincidental questions.
I think I need to get in on the sylvanish-dieAntagonista sex. Now. 😀
E-Orgy :O *I’ll bring my banana*
@...dieAntagonista: if i’m bored out of my mind i shall make 23 questions of doom, but as i notice i need your brains also, and yes… Dr.Devine u can help too.
and i never notice this is for it. but anyhow let’s continue
____________________________________________________
12. You meet a wizard in downtown Chicago. The wizard tells you he can make you more attractive if you pay him money. When you ask how this process works, the wizard points to a random person on the street. You look at this random stranger. The wizard says, “I will now make them a dollar more attractive.” He waves his magic wand. Ostensibly, this person does not change at all; as far as you can tell, nothing is different. But–somehow–this person is suddenly a little more appealing. The tangible difference is invisible to the naked eye, but you can’t deny that this person is vaguely sexier. This wizard has a weird rule, though–you can only pay him once. You can’t keep giving him money until you’re satisfied. You can only pay him one lump sum up front.
How much cash do you give the wizard?
__________________________________________________
off note:
i have been noticing that women are more seemingly attractive to Bisexuals why is that? if you take out the “sex extra fun” what more is left behind.
Question to the ladies!
dammit in 3 day’s i am 1 year closer to death. woot!
12. Not a single dime.
@...MonkeyHitman: You mean women are more likely to be bisexual than men? If so, I can only speak for myself but I have found that people like people that look similar to them. And if you have a healthy mind you’re not grossed out by your own body, so why should you be grossed out by another woman’s body. I’ve never had sex with a woman though, so it’s all in the mind anyway. I also like drawing them. In fact I can only draw women.
But yeah you also have to consider the fact that gay and bisexual men are way less accepted by society than women who are gay/bi.
Wait what, you know when you’re going to die?!
@...dieAntagonista: Doesn’t everybody?
@...MonkeyHitman: I don’t quite understand what you’re asking.
I’ve never been attracted to another woman. I’ve nothing against it, and if I did find myself attracted to another woman, I might act on it. It’s just never happened.
Oh and I don’t think I’d pay. I’m convinced that there is always something you have to give up in order to gain and I don’t know what my deal w/ the devil would really require.
Well, to put it simply… I just hit it off more with women. I am heavily attracted to, and love women, while really all I have for guys is sort of affection and raw attraction.And most of them find the honesty startling.
Also: I like to think the ladies get a combo pack: gay best friend to go shopping with, and nice guy to take you to dinner. 😉 No to mention.. guys are kinda dicks. And its lots easier to find straight chicks than it is to find gay guys. More of a statistics thing.
haha
Happy birthday monkey!
or in three days happy birthday.. whatever.
@question: I’d go drop out my savings account, which is sizable, and here is why: if a dollar makes you subtly sexier, then the contents of my bank account will probably turn me into some kind of sex god, which would then give me a distinct advantage over every human being I came in contact with. Overnight, I would be able to simply collect money just by existing. Not to mention I’d enjoy being chased nearly continuously by every woman in direct proximity, as I’d probably develop phermones by a certain point. Probably around the $10,000 dollar point…
@...dieAntagonista: actually no i ment that women seems to like bi’s somewhat more then straight men, ofcourse im not saying all but there is a hefty amount that do.
you so you must know www.deviantart.com
no hehehe i’m just saying in opposite way that i’m making birthday.which will invole boobs, alcohol, & a shit load of weed.
@...SumoSnipe: Gee, I knew I missed out on something this entire time. Damn.
Though I don’t really think that I need to alter who I am as a person, I definitely would not mind altering myself to gain near infinite power. Really, I’m just egomaniacal. 😀 Not as bad as natedog, but wouldn’t mind gaining that kind of boost in the charisma category at all.
@ladies: he was asking why ladies found bisexual guys more attractive than regular dudes… i believe. I dunno.
@MonkeyHitman: Clarify!
nevermind…
@...Dr.Devine: Haha no way. You would really do that? Do you really think you could handle being some sort of a star. Privacy is way too important to me. Besides I’m vain enough as it is, so if I were to pay him everything I got I doubt I’d keep learning the way I do now. Mind > Attractiveness
@...MonkeyHitman: Ow. Actually, I have never met a gay or bisexual man. Or maybe I did, but didn’t know it. I don’t think I’m any more attracted to bi men than to straight men, but it’s exciting to hear that there a men who aren’t ‘afraid’ of being bi. I’m sure there are a bunch of bi men out there who would never admit to it, so they date only women.
@...MonkeyHitman: Oh yea and of course I know deviantart. Unfortunately I’m too self-absorbed to upload my drawings on there. I mean I appreciate good art by other people, but not when my art has to compete with a bazillion other drawings.
I’m just an amateur anyway.
@dieAntagonista: Yup. In a heart beat. My good looks would conquer the world. BWAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!
What about the moldy bible?
What about the moldy bible?
Seriously. I think this thread was at no point really about the fungal bible.
@...nobody knows: your name says it all
@...ColombianMonkey: Indeed.
@...Dr.Devine: Tsk tsk. Evil.
@...dieAntagonista: oh no don’t be so about your drawings, in deviantart they do say allot of positive things. you should upload them.
BTW “can i have your number… a.k.a. your beautiful ass Number” www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTFZyl7hfBw
Public Notice: changed my name from MonkeyHitman to ColombianMonkey
I don’t care about the moldy bible, but If we can make it at least to a thousand comments, my life would make sense again.
Because I’m Black?? www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCxpBUmkD_Y&feature=related
@...ColombianMonkey: I was just gonna ask if you’re MonkeyHitman’s long lost brother.
Haha yes they do say a lot of positive things, but should your art be even slightly morbid – there are a bunch of people who will spam your comments until you lose your mind. Thanks but no thanks.
Oh my fucking god. I love that Mad TV episode.
“The back of yo head is RIDICULOUS.”
I used to watch that video at least 3 times ever day.
White Lady ?? www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZVF-nirSq5s&feature=related
Aren’t Asians Great ? www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-5HhN0_75A&feature=related
my fucking god i love madtv to the death i plan to buy all series. It’s funny but somehow i see myself like doing those kinda of shit
lolz on colombianonkey…
Queer eye for the straight guy www.youtube.com/watch?v=KKJVSMT1OsI&feature=related
jesus the amount of madtv …my god just watch all of them !!!
www.youtube.com/results?search_query=madtv&search_type=
but before you do watch this one !
and this one www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3-WzqfbVHU&feature=related