The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death! What’s that… a bonus?!? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you go live in an old age home. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, and you get ready for High School. You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little boy(girl), you go back, you spend your last 9 months floating with luxuries like central heating, spa, room service on tap, then you finish off as an orgasm!!Uff…
LISTER
Okay, okay! But look at the flipside of the coin. It’s not all good. Take someone like, say . . . St. Francis of Assissi. In this universe, he’s the petty-minded little sadist who goes around maiming small animals! Or Santa Claus–what a bastard!
Bill Hick, Life is a Ride, or A young Man on Acid, are two great commentaries on Life & Death. Carlin is intentionally cynical. When all that DMT goes off in your brain as you die, you just begin a new life. Don’t worry it will be as good as an orgasm if not better, no rush though.
That’s a lot of baby making. A more accurate title would be “Meaning of Life…if you don’t know about about birth control”
we are doomed!
Wow, now I don’t really have a will to live on… 🙁
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death! What’s that… a bonus?!? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you go live in an old age home. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, and you get ready for High School. You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little boy(girl), you go back, you spend your last 9 months floating with luxuries like central heating, spa, room service on tap, then you finish off as an orgasm!!Uff…
Now that’s what life should be!!
casemods, that was the most beautiful thing I ever read this week.
George Carlin said just about the same thing. I do notice a few changes from his joke.
No I am not saying that he was the first one to do that joke, but he is the first one I heard say it.
I found this on Urban Dictionary.
Go and watch Red Dwarf – Backwards.
LISTER
Okay, okay! But look at the flipside of the coin. It’s not all good. Take someone like, say . . . St. Francis of Assissi. In this universe, he’s the petty-minded little sadist who goes around maiming small animals! Or Santa Claus–what a bastard!
Bill Hick, Life is a Ride, or A young Man on Acid, are two great commentaries on Life & Death. Carlin is intentionally cynical. When all that DMT goes off in your brain as you die, you just begin a new life. Don’t worry it will be as good as an orgasm if not better, no rush though.