A true conservative doesn’t see things this way, they see it this way.

This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by over priced electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US department of energy which don’t allow our energy producers to produce as much power as they could by regulating them to death. I then took a shower in the questionably clean water provided by the municipal water utility which is financed at the local level by taxes and runs on a budget so is good. After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated/sensored channels which would be better if left to regulate themselves to see what the national weather service of the national oceanographic and atmospheric administration determined the weather was going to be like within a 30 – 40 percential using satellites designed, built, and launched by the national aeronautics and space administration which if done by the private sector could be more advanced and priced better, though regulations don’t allow such advanceds outside of the government. I watched this while eating my breakfast of US department of agriculture inspected food, which if less regualted would be 10 time less expensive with only 1 – 2 % increased risk and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the food and drug administration, or at least have companies behind them with enough money to get the approval, and priced so high because of God knows what regulations, medicare substaties, ect…. At the appropriate time as regulated by the US congress (WTF congress says I should take my medicine when?) and kept accurate by the national institute of standards and technology and the US naval observatory (Just threw up a bit, accurate LOL), I get into my national highway traffic safety administration approved automobile, priced 10 times higher to meet this certification) and set out to work on the roads build by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation which rock!, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by none but taxed hevily by the environmental protection agency, using legal tender issued by the federal reserve bank and based on and representing nothing. On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to be sent out via the US postal service which is way less ueful and dependable or cost effective than Fedex or UPS which is a great example how private sector > government, and drop the kids off at the public school sponsored by local taxes and running on a budget which is good. After spending another day not being maimed or killed at work thanks to the workplace regulations imposed by the department of labor and the occupational safety and health administration which keeps everyone equal and doesn’t promote workplace excelence but workplace mediocracy, enjoying another two meals which again do not kill me because everyone else on earth dies at every meal, I drive my NHTSA, overweight, slow, overpriced, slightly better than w/o saftey features car back home on the DOT roads which are good, to my house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes which drive up the price of homes and provide little value again diminishing exceptionalism and fire marshal's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all its valuables thanks to the local police department because noone has morals. I then log on to the internet which was developed by the defense advanced research projects administration and mastered by private enterprise that allows me to be tracked by the governemnt and post on freerepublic.com and fox news forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do much right.

We just want the freedom to make our own decisions. This post suggests that everyone everywhere else on earth dies every day because their cars/roads/food/houses/interwebs sucks.